November 22nd, 2004


(no subject)

My patience is begining to wear thin. Fallujah's a bombed-out wreck, and all I keep hearing is praise for the 'courages marines' that 'drove out the terrorists'. I acknowledge it does take some courage to charge into a hail of enemy bullets. It takes courage to die. But killing's another matter entirely. A single sniper kills a single marine and a pair of 500-lb bombs are droppped in retaliation. That's keeping a sense of fucking perspective. That's never gonna earn us any enmity in way of property damage or innocent casualities, nope, no way. I've been thinking a lot about the war in Iraq lately. About Abu Grahib and Nick Berg and all the lies and deceit. I keep hearing that 'prudent' millitary measures often 'supercede' 'ethical considerations'. I keep hearing 'support our troops'. And, when I think about it, I more and more find myself coming to the conclusion that the only reasonable thing to do is to leave our troops there. You made your bed, boys, now lie in it.
And then the administration gets blamed. That those monster deserve far worse than the fate Hell has in store for them I cannot dream of questioning. But that doesn't excuse the everyday man in uniform. You are accountable for your own actions. You hear me? YOU ARE ACCOUNTABLE FOR YOUR OWN ACTIONS. Mitigating circumstances always apply, but "He told me to" is not good enough- it never has been, and it never will be. So I hear "You don't defy orders; it's indoctrinated out of you."

You can lie to me all you want- tell me this war is justified, that Dubya's a good leader, that there are circumstances, EVER, when killing an innocent in cold blood is justified, that this election was meaningless and we should just 'get over it' and I won't do more than growl and argue.
But tell me that surrendering of humanity is inevitable- EVER!- tell me that 'you can't fight city hall', that 'you can't buck the system', and I'll fucking abandon you. Whatever hope of having some slight degree of esteem in my eyes will be GONE. Wholly and completely. Fate only exists insofar as you accept it. Do you think I fought, do you think I struggled, do you think I sacrificed family and future and friends and very nearly sanity only in my imagination? That my whole damn fight was made up?
"You were different. Yours was a special case."
No. I was special in that I survived. In that I, in a manner of reckoning, won. I know full well that I shouldn't have been able to do it, that I should've given out and given up and put the damn bullet through my head. I had what it took to outlast the system and luck was not wholly against me in and that regard- that regard alone- I was a 'special case'. The ability to win is rare. The ability to fight is omnipresent.
But what of those who think the war immoral? Who don't want to be there? Well, morality is nice, but without the guts to back it up, it's worthless. You CHOSE to become part of an institution based on wanton murder, you CHOSE to be shipped out to a war you knew was immoral (or didn't bother to do the research to find out was immoral, and you CHOSE to take part in every damn massacre you took part in.
"But when your back is against the wall, you have no choice!" BULLSHIT! You always have a choice. ALWAYS. They tell you to sign up, you can choose to go to jail. They put a gun in your hand and tell you to kill, you can choose to not shoot- and, if you don't, who to shoot. And if the cost of defiance is your life, then YOU SHOULD HAVE FUCKING DIED! Do you honestly think that there is a single goal you can achieve, a single person to kill or objective to take, a single monetary reward or upheld tradition, that is worth the sacrifice of your honor? You think any amount of money or murder can bring it back?
This culture (blame the media and I'll slit your fucking throat) has a real fucking problem with heroism. We glorify the stories but kill the practicioners. That's not news to anyone, but the passage of time doesn't make it any less true. I know some of you are sick of hearing about this. You're the ones who need it most(thus the lack of a cut). That you can become jaded about something so important on so many levels shows that you're as much in need of help as society itself. Morality? Nah, that's boring. It's been done to death. Let's change the channel.
Go ahead. Worship in your damned cult of originality and whine about accountability without practicing it yourself. Fight your immoral wars and crucify your honorable exceptions. But know that you'll get no support from me.